אבן העזר קנ״דEven HaEzer 154

Se’if 1א׳

אֵלּוּ שֶׁכּוֹפִין אוֹתָם לְהוֹצִיא וְלִתֵּן כְּתֻבָּה: מִי שֶׁנּוֹלַד לוֹ רֵיחַ הַפֶּה אוֹ רֵיחַ הַחֹטֶם, אוֹ שֶׁחָזַר לִהְיוֹת מְקַבֵּץ צוֹאַת כְּלָבִים אוֹ בּוּרְסְקִי, אוֹ לִהְיוֹת מְחַתֵּךְ נְחשֶׁת מֵעִקָּרוֹ. וְאִם רָצְתָה תֵּשֵׁב עִם בַּעְלָהּ. וְאִם יָדְעָה בָּהֶן קֹדֶם שֶׁנִשֵּׂאת, אֵין כּוֹפִין לְהוֹצִיא, דְּסָבְרָה וְקִבְּלָה (טוּר בְּשֵׁם הָרְמַ"ה). נַעֲשָׂה הָאִישׁ מֻכֶּה שְׁחִין, כּוֹפִין אוֹתוֹ לְהוֹצִיא וְלִתֵּן כְּתֻבָּה; וְאַף עַל פִּי שֶׁהִיא רוֹצָה לֵישֵׁב עִמּוֹ, אוֹ שֶׁהִתְנָה עִמוֹ קֹדֶם שֶׁנְשָׂאָהּ, אֵין שׁוֹמְעִין לָהּ, אֶלָּא מַפְרִישִׁין אוֹתָם בְּעַל כָּרְחָם, מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהִיא מְמִיקַתּוּ. וְאִם אָמְרָה: אֵשֵׁב עִמּוֹ בְּעֵדִים, כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא יָבֹא עָלַי, שׁוֹמְעִין לָהּ. הַגָּה: יֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים דְּמוּמָר כּוֹפִין אוֹתוֹ עַל יְדֵי כּוּתִים לְהוֹצִיא (ב"י סִימָן קל"ד בְּשֵׁם א"ח וּבְמָרְדְּכַי פֶּרֶק הַמְגָרֵשׁ), וּבִלְבַד שֶׁיְּבַטֵּל בִּשְׁעַת הַגֵּט (שָׁם בְּמָרְדְּכַי). וְיֵשׁ חוֹלְקִים וְאוֹמְרִים דְּאֵין כּוֹפִין לְמוּמָר אוֹ שְׁאָר עוֹבֵר עַל דָּת (תְּשׁוּבַת מור"ם), אֶלָּא אִם כֵּן פּוֹשֵׁעַ לָהּ, כְּגוֹן שֶׁמַאֲכִילָהּ דְּבַר אִסוּר (מהרי"ו סִימָן כ"ב), אוֹ שֶׁעָבַר עַל חֵרֶם שֶׁשִּׁעְבֵּד עַצְמוֹ נֶגְדָּהּ שֶׁלֹּא לְהַקְנִיטָהּ וְשֶׁלֹּא לְהַכּוֹתָהּ, אוֹ שֶׁנוֹדֵר וְאֵינוֹ מְקַיֵּם שֶׁבָּנָיו מֵתִים בַּעֲוֹן נְדָרִים (הַגָּהוֹת מַיְמוֹנִי סוֹף אִשּׁוּת). מִי שֶׁהוּא רוֹעֶה זוֹנוֹת וְאִשְׁתּוֹ קוֹבֶלֶת עָלָיו, אִם יֵשׁ עֵדוּת בַּדָּבָר, שֶׁרָאוּ אוֹתוֹ עִם מְנָאֲפִים אוֹ שֶׁהוֹדָה, יֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים שֶׁכּוֹפִין אוֹתוֹ לְהוֹצִיא, אֲבָל מִשּׁוּם שֶׁמְבִיאִין לוֹ יְלָדִים כּוּתִים אֵין לָחוּשׁ, דִּלְמָא מְשַׁקְרִים עָלָיו (חִדּוּשֵׁי אֲגֻדָּה דִּיבָמוֹת):

These are the [reasons] we force him to divorce her and to give her the ketubah: One who develops bad breath of the mouth or nose, or goes back to become a collector of dog feces, or a tanner, or to a scraper of copper from its source [i.e. a miner]. If she wants, she can stay with her husband. Rem"a: And if she knew [about this problem] before she was married, we do not force him to divorce her, for she understood and accepted it (Tur in the name of the Ramah). If the man becomes afflicted with boils, we force him to divorce her and to give her the ketubah. Even if she wants to stay with him ( Rem"a: Or [even] if she stipulated [that she knew about this] ) we don't listen to her, rather we make them separate against their will, for she exacerbates his condition [if they have sex]. And if she says, "I will stay with him with witnesses [about], so that he does not have sex with me [because they are around]," we listen to her. Rem"a: Some say that [if he becomes] an apostate, we force him to divorce her through non-Jews (Bet Yosef Siman 134 in the name of the O"Ch and the Mordechai Perek Hamegaresh), as long as he voids it at the time of the bill of divorce (ibid Mordechai). Some argue and say that we do not force an apostate [to divorce], or any transgressor against the faith (Teshuvat Mora"m), unless he makes her transgress, for example feeding her prohibited food (Mohry"V Siman 22), or he violates a promise that he made upon himself that he would not tease her or hit her, or he makes a promise and he does not fulfill it, for sons die [as a result] of sins of [violating] vows (Hagahot Maimoni end of Ishut). One who pimps prostitutes, and his wife complains about it, if there are witnesses, and they see him with adulterers or he admits, some say we force him to divorce her, but we do not suspect he caused the bringing of gentile children, for perhaps they are lying about him (Chiddushei Aggudah D'Yevamot).

Se’if 2ב׳

מִי שֶׁהָיָה בַּעְלָהּ בַּעַל רֵיחַ הַפֶּה אוֹ רֵיחַ הַחֹטֶם, אוֹ מְלַקֵּט צוֹאַת כְּלָבִים וְכַיּוֹצֵא בָּהּ, וּמֵת וְנָפְלָה לִפְנֵי אָחִיו וְיֵשׁ בּוֹ אוֹתוֹ מוּם שֶׁהָיָה בְּבַעְלָהּ, יְכוֹלָה הִיא לוֹמַר: לְאָחִיךְ הָיִיתִי יְכוֹלָה לְקַבֵּל וּלְךְ אֵינִי יְכוֹלָה לְקַבֵּל, וְיַחֲלֹץ וְיִתֵּן לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה:

If a woman has a husband with bad breath of the mouth or nose, or he collected dog feces, or the like, and he died [childless, causing his wife to be obligated to fulfill the mitzvah of either yibbum or chalitzah]. If [the yavam] has the same blemish of his brother, she can say: "With your brother, I could accept this. With you, I am not willing to accept this." He does chalitzah and he gives her her ketubah[-worth].

Se’if 3ג׳

הָאוֹמֵר: אֵינִי זָן וְאֵינִי מְפַרְנֵס, כּוֹפִין אוֹתוֹ לָזוּן. וְאִם אֵין בֵּית דִּין יְכוֹלִים לְכוֹפוֹ לָזוּן, כְּגוֹן שֶׁאֵין לוֹ בַּמֶּה לְפַרְנֵס וְאֵינוֹ רוֹצֶה לְהִשְׂתַּכֵּר לְהַרְוִיחַ וְלָזוּן, אִם תִּרְצֶה הִיא, כּוֹפִין אוֹתוֹ לְהוֹצִיא מִיָּד וְלִתֵּן כְּתֻבָּה. וְכֵן הַדִּין לְמִי שֶׁאֵינוֹ רוֹצֶה לְשַׁמֵּשׁ. הַגָּה: וְכֵן אִישׁ שֶׁרָגִיל לִכְעֹס וּלְהוֹצִיא אִשְׁתּוֹ מִבֵּיתוֹ תָּמִיד, כּוֹפִין אוֹתוֹ לְהוֹצִיא, כִּי עַל יְדֵי זֶה אֵינוֹ זָנָהּ לִפְעָמִים וּפוֹרֵשׁ מִמֶנָה בְּתַשְׁמִישׁ יוֹתֵר מֵעוֹנָתָהּ וְהָוֵי כְּמוֹרֵד מִמְזוֹנוֹת וְתַשְׁמִישׁ (תְּשׁוּבַת הָרַשְׁבָּ"א סִימָן תרצ"ג). וְעַיֵּן לְעֵיל סִימָן ע' וְסִימָן ע"ז. אִישׁ הַמַכֶּה אִשְׁתּוֹ, עֲבֵרָה הִיא בְּיָדוֹ כְּמַכֶּה חֲבֵרוֹ. וְאִם רָגִיל הוּא בְּכָךְ, יֵשׁ בְּיַד בֵּית דִּין לְיַסְּרוֹ וּלְהַחֲרִימוֹ וּלְהַלְקוֹתוֹ בְּכָל מִינֵי רִדּוּי וּכְפִיָּה, וּלְהַשְׁבִּיעוֹ שֶׁלֹּא יַעֲשֶׂה עוֹד, וְאִם אֵינוֹ צַיִּת לְדִבְרֵי הַבֵּית דִּין יֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים שֶׁכּוֹפִין אוֹתוֹ לְהוֹצִיא, וּבִלְבַד שֶׁמַתְרִין בּוֹ תְּחִלָּה פַּעַם אַחַת אוֹ שְׁתַּיִם כִּי אֵינוֹ מִדֶּרֶךְ בְּנֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל לְהַכּוֹת נְשׁוֹתֵיהֶם, וּמַעֲשֵׂה כּוּתִים הוּא. וְכָל זֶה כְּשֶׁהוּא מַתְחִיל, אֲבָל אִם מְקַלַּלְתּוֹ בְּחִנָם אוֹ מְזַלְזֶלֶת אָבִיו וְאִמוֹ, וְהוֹכִיחָהּ בִּדְבָרִים וְאֵינָהּ מַשְׁגַּחַת עָלָיו, יֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים דְּמֻתָּר לְהַכּוֹתָהּ, וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים דַּאֲפִלּו אִשָּׁה רָעָה אָסוּר לְהַכּוֹתָהּ. וְהַסְּבָרָא רִאשׁוֹנָה הִיא עִקָר. וְאִם אֵינוֹ יָדוּעַ מִי הַגּוֹרֵם, אֵין הַבַּעַל נֶאֱמָן לוֹמַר שֶׁהִיא הַמַתְחֶלֶת, שֶׁכָּל הַנָשִׁים בְּחֶזְקַת כְּשֵׁרוֹת, וּמוֹשִׁיבִין בֵּינֵיהֶן אֲחֵרוֹת לִרְאוֹת בְּשֶׁל מִי הָרָעָה הַזֹאת, וְאִם הִיא מְקַלַּלְתּוֹ חִנָם, יוֹצֵאת בְּלֹא כְּתֻבָּה. וְנִרְאֶה לִי, דַּוְקָא בִּרְגִילָה בְּכָךְ, וְאַחַר הַהַתְרָאָה, וּכְמוֹ שֶׁנִתְבָּאֵר לְעֵיל סִימָן קט"ו. וְאִם הָלְכָה מִבֵּיתוֹ וְלָוְתָה וְאָכְלָה, אִם יָצְתָה מִכֹּחַ שֶׁהִכָּה אוֹתָהּ תָּמִיד, חַיָּב לְשַׁלֵּם (כָּל דִּבְרֵי הַגָּ"ה זוֹ תִּמְצָא בְּמָרְדְּכַי פֶּרֶק נַעֲרָה בְּשֵׁם מוהר"ם וב"ז סִימָן פ"ח), וּכְמוֹ שֶׁנִתְבָּאֵר לְעֵיל סִימָן ע':

If someones says, "I will not give food nor provide for [my wife]," we force him to give food. And if the court cannot force him to give food, such as one who doesn't have anything to provide and doesn't want to make money to become profitable and provide food [that way], if she wants, we force him to divorce her immediately and giver her her ketubah. The law is such to someone who does not want have sex. Rem"a: Similarly, a man who gets angry often and consistently kicks out his wife from his house, we force him to divorce her, for because of this he will not provide food for her sometimes, and he will separate from her from sexual relations more times than her rights to conjugal relations, and that is like refusal to provide food and sex [which are grounds for divorce] (Teshuvat HaRashba Siman 693). And see earlier Siman 70 and Siman 77. A man who hits his wife, has a transgression in his hand as much as striking his fellow. If he does this often, the court had the right to cause him pain and to excommunicate him, to whip him, to use all types of force, and to make him swear he will not do it again. And if he does not obey the court, some say we force him to divorce her, as long as he is warned one or twice, for it is not the way of Jews to hit their wives, that is the actions of the gentiles. This only applies when he starts it, but if she curses him for no reason, or mocks his father and mother, and she contradicts what he says and he has no authority over her, some say it is permitted to hit her. And some say that a bad wife is [also] prohibited to strike. The first opinion is the essential one. If it is not known who started it, the husband is not believed to say that she started it, for all women are assumed kosher, and they place others among them to see who is the bad one. And if she curses him for no reason, she is divorced without her ketubah. And it seems to me that this is only when this happens often, and after warning, as was explained earlier siman 115. If she left his house and borrowed [money] and ate [food], if she left because of him hitting her so often, he must pay her back (all of this note can be found in the Mordechai Perek Naara in the name of the Mohar"am and the B"Z Siman 88), and as is explained earlier Siman 70.